Oprah vs. Chuck Norris

[CKE]

you wanted it favpack here it is which one would win



I feel for you vs. Ill make you have no feeling

[Favpack]

Good job Kid. I go with Oprah in a tough 15 round split decision. Chuck would definitely do some damage, but, let's face it - any venue is a home game for Queen O. Plus, she ran a marathon once, and she could pay Ali or Leon Spinks, or Tommy "hit-man" Hearns like $10M in cash to train her.

But, who would Christie Brinkley root for?

[LUFPAN]

I say Chuck wins by disqualification when Dr. Phil jumps into the ring and attempts to distract the ref by showing his breast.

[Favpack]

I hear Dr. Phil is a good cut man - he can do wonders with that gel stuff they put on your mangled eyebrow. Another clear advantage for O.

[CKE]

i had to go with chuck i had him on my *** for a full day running from that roundhouse kick now hes after wide run wide run

[slorch]

Oprah also has the Psychological advantage of her friend, Tom Cruise. Oprah in 3. TKO( tai kwan Oprah)

[ftballin11]

Chuck Norris is unbeatable. According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can roundhouse kick you yesterday.

Somebody please tell me who could beat that, what would Oprah do... talk to you until you can't take it anymore and drive you to roundhouse kick yourself?

[wide-e-wide]

Hate to break it to you guys....but this match-up already happened over 20 years ago. It went down something like this............

Oprah bribed everyone watching the match...with brand new cars...and as the audience rushed Chuck......BAMM!!
Oprah started bombarding him with questions about his childhood...and inferiority complex brought on by his lack of vertical prowess...
and while he wass vulnerable...she hit him with the double whammy...and asked him questions about his failed career as a martial artist turned actor...

Oprah has the edge if this happens...

But after a huge slip-up on the part of Oprah...(she pushes too far with this comment) "It's okay...let it all out Chucky...we all know that Bruce Lee was better...it's time for you to own your fears...

The words "Bruce Lee" ..."better" and "fear"...
Send Chuck into an absolute frenzy..

After a flurry of roundhouses...and furniture flying all over the place...

They stand toe to toe...mano y mano...eye to eye...the suspense was so thick...not even Oprah could have bitten into it.

And in an extremely unorthadoxed move....

Oprah just lays one on him...a big fat juicy one right on the lips...

Chuck...in shock....pulls back...and stares at O...not knowing what to think...
Then suddenly.....they lock lips again...passion flows throughout the arena...Two juggerauts of the free world...embracing and groping with moves that rival two puppies fighting in a pillow case....

Since all guest of the Oprah Winfrey Show are given free deluxe accomodations at Chicago's luxurious Omni Suites Hotel...O pulls some strings and gets them a "Get Your Freak On" penthouse suite......

Their night of supernatural bliss...causes earthquakes throughout the US and parts of Canada...

And when they are both spent....lying motionless on those red velvet sheets...on that heart-shaped bed....they laugh uncontrollably...knowing the world is a better place now that they are united.

9 months later......this massive love connection.......reaches it's climax...when Oprah gives birth to their super-human son... A being the likes of which..the world was not competely ready for...

Chuck and Oprah produced----


Reggie Bush.

[Slim-Rob]

Hate to break it to you guys....but this match-up already happened over 20 years ago. It went down something like this............

Oprah bribed everyone watching the match...with brand new cars...and as the audience rushed Chuck......BAMM!!
Oprah started bombarding him with questions about his childhood...and inferiority complex brought on by his lack of vertical prowess...
and while he wass vulnerable...she hit him with the double whammy...and asked him questions about his failed career as a martial artist turned actor...

Oprah has the edge if this happens...

But after a huge slip-up on the part of Oprah...(she pushes too far with this comment) "It's okay...let it all out Chucky...we all know that Bruce Lee was better...it's time for you to own your fears...

The words "Bruce Lee" ..."better" and "fear"...
Send Chuck into and absolute frenzy..

After a flurry of roundhouses...and furniture flying all over the place...

They stand toe to toe...mano y mano...eye to eye...the suspense was so thick...not even Oprah could have bitten into it.

And in an extremely unorthadoxed move....

Oprah just lays one on him...a big fat juicy one right on the lips...

Chuck...in shock....pulls back...and stares at O...not knowing what to think...
Then suddenly.....they lock lips again...passion flows throughout the arena...Two juggerauts of the free world...embracing and groping with moves that rival two puppies fighting in a pillow case....

Since all guest of the Oprah Winfrey Show are given free deluxe accomodations at Chicago's luxurious Omni Suites Hotel...O pulls some strings and gets them a "Get Your Freak On" penthouse suite......

Their night of supernatural bliss...causes earthquakes throughout the US and parts of Canada...

And when they are both spent....lying motionless on those red velvet sheets...on that heart-shaped bed....they laugh uncontrollably...knowing the world is a better place now that they are united.

9 months later......this massive love connection.......reaches it's climax...when Oprah gives birth to their super-human son... A being the likes of which..the world was not competely ready for...

Chuck and Oprah produced----


Reggie Bush.

(insert 5atexasfootball.com adjective here)

[KatyTigerDad0407]

(insert 5atexasfootball.com adjective here)bust-a-lick

[beachbum0x6]

Hate to break it to you guys....but this match-up already happened over 20 years ago. It went down something like this............

Oprah bribed everyone watching the match...with brand new cars...and as the audience rushed Chuck......BAMM!!
Oprah started bombarding him with questions about his childhood...and inferiority complex brought on by his lack of vertical prowess...
and while he wass vulnerable...she hit him with the double whammy...and asked him questions about his failed career as a martial artist turned actor...

Oprah has the edge if this happens...

But after a huge slip-up on the part of Oprah...(she pushes too far with this comment) "It's okay...let it all out Chucky...we all know that Bruce Lee was better...it's time for you to own your fears...

The words "Bruce Lee" ..."better" and "fear"...
Send Chuck into an absolute frenzy..

After a flurry of roundhouses...and furniture flying all over the place...

They stand toe to toe...mano y mano...eye to eye...the suspense was so thick...not even Oprah could have bitten into it.

And in an extremely unorthadoxed move....

Oprah just lays one on him...a big fat juicy one right on the lips...

Chuck...in shock....pulls back...and stares at O...not knowing what to think...
Then suddenly.....they lock lips again...passion flows throughout the arena...Two juggerauts of the free world...embracing and groping with moves that rival two puppies fighting in a pillow case....

Since all guest of the Oprah Winfrey Show are given free deluxe accomodations at Chicago's luxurious Omni Suites Hotel...O pulls some strings and gets them a "Get Your Freak On" penthouse suite......

Their night of supernatural bliss...causes earthquakes throughout the US and parts of Canada...

And when they are both spent....lying motionless on those red velvet sheets...on that heart-shaped bed....they laugh uncontrollably...knowing the world is a better place now that they are united.

9 months later......this massive love connection.......reaches it's climax...when Oprah gives birth to their super-human son... A being the likes of which..the world was not competely ready for...

Chuck and Oprah produced----


Reggie Bush.

www.chucknorrisfacts.com/additionalfacts.html
Check it out...I love this site:D

[BigArab]

I don't think I've ever laughed so hard.

[dragonfootballfan]

where does Mark May fit into this discussion. He blocked for John Riggins

[mad_fan]

....
Chuck and Oprah produced----


Reggie Bush.

That story has been around a couple of years and I still don't believe...
Did Chuck submit to a test??? If not, Reggie still don't know who his daddy is...

[Favpack]

In the words of Stu --

Booooyaaaawwwww!

That just ain't right --- on so many levels.

But, come to think of it - that one RB highlight where he leaps over the UCLA defender - kinda looks like a roundhouse kick to me.

[CKE]

who chuck is really giving it to oprah. but shes hanging in there alright

[dada]

All of you are idiots!

Have you EVER seen Chuck and Oprah at the sametime?...NO...they are the same person.

[CKE]

All of you are idiots!

Have you EVER seen Chuck and Oprah at the sametime?...NO...they are the same person.

:eek: he could be right i have NEVER seen them in the same place

[mad_fan]

All of you are idiots!

Have you EVER seen Chuck and Oprah at the sametime?...NO...they are the same person.


So you're saying Reggie came along when somebody told Oprah to go f*&^ herself?

[dada]

That story has been around a couple of years and I still don't believe...
Did Chuck submit to a test??? If not, Reggie still don't know who his daddy is...
Bush was adopted. Chuck has 6 kids. He was very strict and stressed perfection to his kids....his kids are:

Muhammad Ali-Norris
Pele Norris
Lance Armstrong-Norris
Walter Payton-Norris
Wilt Chamberlin-Norris
and the baby
Vince Young-Norris

[CKE]

So you're saying Reggie came along when somebody told Oprah to go f*&^ herself?


aaaaaaaaaaa hahahahahahahah....................... but wait y would anyone ever tell oprah to do that she is loved by ........well everyone

[dada]

So you're saying Reggie came along when somebody told Oprah to go f*&^ herself?
Oprah is REALLY Chuck.....so it's possible. Remember Chuck lost his virginity before his dad.

[mad_fan]

aaaaaaaaaaa hahahahahahahah....................... but wait y would anyone ever tell oprah to do that she is loved by ........well everyone

Everybody loves Miss Kitty.....Oprah...not so much....

[Miss Kitty]

WOW! Thanks.

[dada]

Reading all this reminded me of a thread that we had awhile back called "Rumors" or something like that...where everyone started rumors.


I heard somewhere that Wide was a Drum Major for the OU Sooner Band. And he has "Saw 'em Off" stickers on his back windshield.

[mad_fan]

Reading all this reminded me of a thread that we had awhile back called "Rumors" or something like that...where everyone started rumors.


I heard somewhere that Wide was a Drum Major for the OU Sooner Band. And he has "Saw 'em Off" stickers on his back windshield.


No way Wide was ever in the band!!!!

I've seen the sticker.:D

[Miss Kitty]

Let me see...if I had Oprah's money what would I do....Hmmmmmm

Jumbotrons for EVERYBODY! LOL

Then I would bribe the SLC city council, by some land, and build an apartment complex....muahhhhhhhhhh! just kidding guys...:D

ooooooo....this could be a string all by itself....."If I had Oprah's money, what would i do?"

[stevefoxsc]

no way chuck norris hand's down he learned his martial art's from bruce lee!!! but if it's fat oprah wow chuck may be in for it

[lonny23]

In a fun joking way, I voted for Chuck.

Physically, Chuck has the advantage on Okra.

Day-to-day, Okra is more motivated than Chuck and is meaner.

In the real world, I say Okra beats Chuck because he's just an actor that plays a tough guy and Okra is a tough guy.

[Packattack94]

I think this would be like this:

Round break down

Round 1-3 Chuck (pummels Oprah with roundhouses)

Round 3-6 Oprah ( has Chuck on ropes crying over finding what went wrong with his inner child)

Round 7-8 Norris (comes off ropes and retalliates with bad acting- corners Oprah)

Round 8-10 Oprah (bounces back a book review)

comes down to desision:

Tie

[ftballin11]

Chuck Norris does NOT lose.

Chuck lets Oprah talk for a few minutes thinking that she would be a waste of a roundhouse and wants to let her survive...BUT Chuck soon learns that her mouth does not close willingly so therefore, Chuck did her a favor and gave her the swift kick to the cheek commonly known as a roundhouse, and she fell. She fell hard at that. Rd.1 KO by Chuck.


GAME OVER.

[Packattack94]

Wait a minute, Chuck against Fat Oprah or Skinny Oprah?

[GRP05]

Chuck would karate chop fat oprah into skinny oprah, then round house kick her into submission.