View Full Version : Current NCAA Powers as Global Powers
Firebird
01-01-2009, 10:08 PM
We did Big XII teams as countries a while back. Here are the current NCAA major players (those teams that people argue about being the "best" in the BCS era) as historical world powers.
USC/USA: Prime real estate, great resources, and a neighborhood conducive to growth (Western Hemisphere/Pac-10). All the other powers are resentful of this fact and hold it against them. Unquestionably the "coolest" of the major players, everyone wants their jersey while at the same time looks at them with green-eyed envy. The people are naturally sunny, optimistic, and cocky in a friendly type of way. Everything about them is over the top-- from the women to the way they party.
Oklahoma/Russia/USSR: Crappy location, almost universally disliked by all the other powers. Loudly accused of using unsavory methods to maintain their position and one distasteful regime is replaced by another. No one can figure out how they manage to keep their :Censor: together. Never quite as powerful as they seem, they are also impossible to keep down, even when it appears that the jig is finally up this time. A favorite target of Texas/France (see below), they quite frequently lose the battles but end up winning the wars.
Ohio State/United Kingdom: Prim and proper aristocrat (Tressel) in charge of a nation of uncouth yobs. No one ever accused them of being "cool", but they earn a certain respect for their ability to keep the rest of Europe/Big Ten in line. Everyone, themselves included, realizes the best days are in the past, but they manage to maintain a stiff upper lip.
Texas/France: Had an astonishing run of success under the command of a brilliant field commander (VY/Napoleon.) Eventually reality came crashing down and they were unable to drive a stake through the hated Sooners/Russians. Obnoxious, arrogant, and pompous, they loudly insist they are the equal of all the other empires and demand the same sort of respect. In truth they are a perpetual second tier power capable of some pretty good moments and all the real empires snicker behind their backs. They have an inexplicable hatred of the Trojans/Americans, because they secretly realize who the true big dog is but won't admit it.
LSU/Ottoman Turkey: The backwards cousins among the empires. None of the other great powers can figure out how they manage to keep a lid on all of the chaos down in their backwater, but they have to respect their army once it is in the field. Occasionally they have threatened to really shake things up, but eventually an inability to keep the home front in order screws things up for them. The other great powers hold their noses when the Turks/Tigers come around and look down their noses at the bizarre customs of the bayou/Asia Minor.
Florida/Mongol Horde: Brilliant tacticians leading swift cavalry from the East to victory after victory. They make the other, staid powers quake in their boots. The only threat on the horizon would be the loss of their leader (Ghengis and Kublai Khan/Spurrier and Meyer and his replacement by someone incompetent (Zook.)
Bonus (Not really a great power, but great potential):
Alabama/Germany: Charismatic yet sinister leader heading up a unified nation of complete fanatics willing to go to any lenght for victory. Style of play: crisp, disciplined, scary. Any hint of a resurgence from Alabama/Germany is met by a collective proclamation of "Oh :Censor:" from the rest of the great powers.
HUM398
01-01-2009, 10:11 PM
We did Big XII teams as countries a while back. Here are the current NCAA major players (those teams that people argue about being the "best" in the BCS era) as historical world powers.
USC/USA: Prime real estate, great resources, and a neighborhood conducive to growth (Western Hemisphere/Pac-10). All the other powers are resentful of this fact and hold it against them. Unquestionably the "coolest" of the major players, everyone wants their jersey while at the same time looks at them with green-eyed envy. The people are naturally sunny, optimistic, and cocky in a friendly type of way. Everything about them is over the top-- from the women to the way they party.
Oklahoma/Russia/USSR: Crappy location, almost universally disliked by all the other powers. Loudly accused of using unsavory methods to maintain their position and one distasteful regime is replaced by another. No one can figure out how they manage to keep their :Censor: together. Never quite as powerful as they seem, they are also impossible to keep down, even when it appears that the jig is finally up this time. A favorite target of Texas/France (see below), they quite frequently lose the battles but end up winning the wars.
Ohio State/United Kingdom: Prim and proper aristocrat (Tressel) in charge of a nation of uncouth yobs. No one ever accused them of being "cool", but they earn a certain respect for their ability to keep the rest of Europe/Big Ten in line. Everyone, themselves included, realizes the best days are in the past, but they manage to maintain a stiff upper lip.
Texas/France: Had an astonishing run of success under the command of a brilliant field commander (VY/Napoleon.) Eventually reality came crashing down and they were unable to drive a stake through the hated Sooners/Russians. Obnoxious, arrogant, and pompous, they loudly insist they are the equal of all the other empires and demand the same sort of respect. In truth they are a perpetual second tier power capable of some pretty good moments and all the real empires snicker behind their backs. They have an inexplicable hatred of the Trojans/Americans, because they secretly realize who the true big dog is but won't admit it.
LSU/Ottoman Turkey: The backwards cousins among the empires. None of the other great powers can figure out how they manage to keep a lid on all of the chaos down in their backwater, but they have to respect their army once it is in the field. Occasionally they have threatened to really shake things up, but eventually an inability to keep the home front in order screws things up for them. The other great powers hold their noses when the Turks/Tigers come around and look down their noses at the bizarre customs of the bayou/Asia Minor.
Florida/Mongol Horde: Brilliant tacticians leading swift cavalry from the East to victory after victory. They make the other, staid powers quake in their boots. The only threat on the horizon would be the loss of their leader (Ghengis and Kublai Khan/Spurrier and Meyer and his replacement by someone incompetent (Zook.)
Bonus (Not really a great power, but great potential):
Alabama/Germany: Charismatic yet sinister leader heading up a unified nation of complete fanatics willing to go to any lenght for victory. Style of play: crisp, disciplined, scary. Any hint of a resurgence from Alabama/Germany is met by a collective proclamation of "Oh :Censor:" from the rest of the great powers.
France....:Censor: France.....
What does that make A&M? Sir Lanka?
F18mustang
01-01-2009, 10:12 PM
France....:Censor: France.....
What does that make A&M? Sir Lanka?
Monaco.
bryanvikings
01-01-2009, 10:14 PM
France....:Censor: France.....
What does that make A&M? Sir Lanka?
lol:notworthy
Firebird
01-01-2009, 10:15 PM
France....:Censor: France.....
What does that make A&M? Sir Lanka?
You're angry...because you know I'm right.
HUM398
01-01-2009, 10:18 PM
You're angry...because you know I'm right.
:Censor: France..... SERIOUSLY?
You could of chose Harvard or Carneige Mellon....but you chose Texas...
I take it your a boomer sooner...Russia...wow....
Firebird
01-01-2009, 10:19 PM
:Censor: France..... SERIOUSLY?
You could of chose Harvard or Carneige Mellon....but you chose Texas...
I take it your a boomer sooner...Russia...wow....
The title of the thread was "current NCAA Powers as Global Powers", genius. Is Harvard a current power.....
HUM398
01-01-2009, 10:22 PM
The title of the thread was "current NCAA Powers as Global Powers", genius. Is Harvard a current power.....
Is France a freaking global power.....seriously, when was the last time France was relevant...1803?
HUM398
01-01-2009, 10:23 PM
The title of the thread was "current NCAA Powers as Global Powers", genius. Is Harvard a current power.....
Hey Genius, youre the only moron in the room calling France a global power...A pimple on my *** has more global relevance then France.
Firebird
01-01-2009, 10:25 PM
Is France a freaking global power.....seriously, when was the last time France was relevant...1803?
Kinda like how Texas had a flash of greatness in the BCS era and then returned to being second rate......
1815, BTW......;)
Firebird
01-01-2009, 10:38 PM
France....:Censor: France.....
What does that make A&M? Sir Lanka?
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
You gotta get a bit more creative. And stop taking everything so damn seriously and personally.....:rolleyes:
farmerfan
01-01-2009, 10:43 PM
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
You gotta get a bit more creative. And stop taking everything so damn seriously and personally.....:rolleyes:
I LOL'ld at this bird.
Also remember when dealing with Texas fans, everything is personal when you don't proclaim them the best of all time ;)
HUM398
01-01-2009, 10:44 PM
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
You gotta get a bit more creative. And stop taking everything so damn seriously and personally.....:rolleyes:
its Jan 1st...and i have a hellish headache...
Wrong time to be asking me not to take things personally.
steeler 01
01-01-2009, 10:45 PM
I LOL'ld at this bird.
Also remember when dealing with Texas fans, everything is personal when you don't proclaim them the best of all time ;)
They turn into a bunch of Frog's.
Firebird
01-01-2009, 10:45 PM
I LOL'ld at this bird.
Also remember when dealing with Texas fans, everything is personal when you don't proclaim them the best of all time ;)
UT fans are for the most part completely humorless. They like to crap on everyone else around them but are constitutionally unable to laugh at themselves. Yet another way the Texas/France analogy rings true.
Texas/France: Had an astonishing run of success under the command of a brilliant field commander (VY/Napoleon.) Eventually reality came crashing down and they were unable to drive a stake through the hated Sooners/Russians. Obnoxious, arrogant, and pompous, they loudly insist they are the equal of all the other empires and demand the same sort of respect. In truth they are a perpetual second tier power capable of some pretty good moments and all the real empires snicker behind their backs. They have an inexplicable hatred of the Trojans/Americans, because they secretly realize who the true big dog is but won't admit it.
At least we got all the french fries b:Censor:ch's.
HUM398
01-01-2009, 10:46 PM
Kinda like how Texas had a flash of greatness in the BCS era and then returned to being second rate......
1815, BTW......;)
Yes because two back to back BCS wins, one being a National title is a flash....Not to mention the 3 other Titles Texas has amassed, and their Current bid to a Fiesta Bowl....
Dude, France hasn't had the much relevance..... ever....
HUM398
01-01-2009, 10:48 PM
UT fans are for the most part completely humorless. They like to crap on everyone else around them but are constitutionally unable to laugh at themselves. Yet another way the Texas/France analogy rings true.
France dude...i would of rather been called Canada.
Firebird
01-01-2009, 10:48 PM
Yes because two back to back BCS wins, one being a National title is a flash....Not to mention the 3 other Titles Texas has amassed, and their Current bid to a Fiesta Bowl....
Dude, France hasn't had the much relevance..... ever....
Charlemange, beeyotches. Those old titles are like medieval dominance in global terms. And the 2005 title is about like the 19th century using the same sort of timeline. Hell, France even got a bid to the Security Council (BCS).
Firebird
01-01-2009, 10:49 PM
France dude...i would of rather been called Canada.
Canada=Iowa. Cold, flat, and never won a damn thing worth bragging about.
HUM398
01-01-2009, 10:55 PM
Canada=Iowa. Cold, flat, and never won a damn thing worth bragging about.
France= SUCK
Id slap you if you were with in arms distance.
Firebird
01-01-2009, 10:57 PM
France= Texas
Id TRY to slap you if you were with in arms distance, because I know you are right and it pisses me off
fify
HUM398
01-01-2009, 11:02 PM
fify
If i was within arms distance....the only person TRYING to do anything would be your effortless attempt to shake the sting off the side of your face.
I have a big ring, so TRY to move a little quicker when the back hand comes for seconds.,
Firebird
01-01-2009, 11:04 PM
If i was within arms distance....the only person TRYING to do anything would be your effortless attempt to shake the sting off the side of your face.
I have a big ring, so TRY to move a little quicker when the back hand comes for seconds.,
HUM=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8HwU-toj2g
Gotta work on firming up that wrist, big fella.:rolleyes:
HUM398
01-01-2009, 11:08 PM
HUM=
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8HwU-toj2g
Gotta work on firming up that wrist, big fella.:rolleyes:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nrx_fEl4E7Q
HUM398
01-01-2009, 11:11 PM
France....:Censor: France.....
I wouldn't call the :Censor: team in the NCAA france....even if i hated them.
Firebird
01-01-2009, 11:11 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6nxQm_LjZghttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nrx_fEl4E7Q
HUM398
01-01-2009, 11:13 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6nxQm_LjZg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DK3WHA3pi0w&feature=related
Firebird
01-01-2009, 11:17 PM
France....:Censor: France.....
I wouldn't call the :Censor: team in the NCAA france....even if i hated them.
Your anger is strong, but your powers are weak from the bottle.....return after a shower and some coffee........
Can tell this was written by aggy. Laced with idiocy and jealousness.
Firebird
01-02-2009, 12:30 AM
Can tell this was written by aggy. Laced with idiocy and jealousness.
http://www.chapellerie-traclet.com/hat/images/beret11.jpg
Firebird
01-02-2009, 12:31 AM
Can tell this was written by aggy. Laced with idiocy and jealousness.
http://www.igourmet.com/images/topics/stinkycheese1.jpg
Firebird
01-02-2009, 12:32 AM
Can tell this was written by aggy. Laced with idiocy and jealousness.
http://www.jaunted.com/files/3873/French_baguette.jpg
Firebird
01-02-2009, 12:33 AM
Can tell this was written by aggy. Laced with idiocy and jealousness.
http://www.gutpilestyle.com/images/frog/frog24.jpg
Firebird
01-02-2009, 12:34 AM
Can tell this was written by aggy. Laced with idiocy and jealousness.
http://joedoyle.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/escargot.jpg
Firebird
01-02-2009, 12:36 AM
Can tell this was written by aggy. Laced with idiocy and jealousness.
http://www.solarnavigator.net/history/explorers_history/Napoleon_Bonapartes_portrait.jpg
F18mustang
01-02-2009, 12:37 AM
http://www.gutpilestyle.com/images/frog/frog24.jpg
http://smiliesftw.com/x/barfaway.gif
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
http://www4.studentsreview.com/univ_pics/1353_n_1090133896.JPG
http://www.enemakit.com/images/14741-Bag-Hose-Tips-300p.jpg
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
http://www.cartoonstock.com/newscartoons/cartoonists/mwl/lowres/mwln1l.jpg
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
http://www.cartoonstock.com/newscartoons/cartoonists/rdi/lowres/rdin630l.jpg
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
http://www.cartoonstock.com/lowres/gpu0006l.jpg
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
http://www.cartoonstock.com/lowres/sco0017l.jpg
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
http://www.hedonistic7.com/images/17.gif
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g211/ny2ks/VLRG_TinyPeniswidec.jpg
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
[IMG]http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g211/ny2ks/shrinkage.jpg
Firebird
01-02-2009, 01:55 AM
http://www.mimethegap.com/Mime%20Trad.%20-%20Mid%20Frown%20BLACK%20LGE.jpg
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g211/ny2ks/2002650670.jpg
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g211/ny2ks/tiny.jpg
http://www.mimethegap.com/Mime%20Trad.%20-%20Mid%20Frown%20BLACK%20LGE.jpg
lol wut.
Firebird
01-02-2009, 01:58 AM
http://www.thespoof.com/sitepics/people/resize_916928_HairyPit1.jpg
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
http://www.petroville.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/10/jealous.jpg
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
http://www.nataliedee.com/070807/i-dunno-i-think-youre-jealous.jpg
A&M=Poland: Legendary for being a bit slow and strange. Downtrodden, although once in the distant, distant past they managed to claw their way to the rank of "2nd tier power". Currently looked at as a hopeless case and a doormat by the sophisticated historical powers around them.
http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y26/Geo71/misc/jealous.jpg
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